So, I just had an awesome conversation with this girl I met on POF. Smart, cute, geeky, isn’t into tall and muscular guys, likes to cook, likes to fish, and…single, and seems actually interested in me :-P How is this possible? From Equation 1*, we know that someone such as this does not actually exist: at least, there has to be some serious catch. But what is it? My first guess (by mad statisticry) would be some kind of serious, weapons-grade emotional baggage, but there are many other possibilities, such as:
Terminal Medical Condition (only a couple years to live)
An uncurable Venerial Disease
Has a Weenie
Hears Voices
Closet Lesbian
Adult Diapers
Severe Allergy to Everything, Including Me
Prehensile Tail
Psycho Stalker Ex (hey, what’s rustling under my bed?)
Very Severe OCD
Psychopathic and Good with Power Tools
…and Knows a Good Place to Bury the Body
…that she Engineered Herself for this Very Purpose
…and it’s Nearing Capacity
Likes the Taste of Human Blood
Severe Genetic Anomaly resulting in the Growth of Extra Limbs from Various Places, Random Fingernails Everywhere, Scales, Feathers, Etc.
Asymptomatic Ebola Carrier
Not that some of these haven’t stopped me before, but I don’t want to go in with any sort of unrealistic expectations ;-)
What do YOU think it is? The betting pool is now open!
* Brains x Beauty x Availability = Constant
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