Standing still <--> still standing

And fighting time so hard I pray
that this moment last forever.
And will the world stay standing still, at least for me.

It isn’t common that your thoughts can be summed up by song lyrics written long before them. But today in a seemingly perfect moment, feeling better than I have in a very long time, I just wanted time to stop in its tracks. Stopping the relentless march of the postsummer Boston cold which, as if lurking behind and inside every molecule of tonight’s beautifully temperate air and gentle breezes, in preparation for a sneak ambush maybe a week away; freezing in its place the nearly full moon that added subtle constance to a wash of flickery streetlamp light. Shady figures loafing just outside the lightscape of a too-bright 24hr convenience store, drivers peeling tires as if pissed at the world, or just at the fact that at midnight in Somerville they had no audience to impress, going nowhere in particular, but going nowhere fast…these and a billion other of those little points of evil and unrest in the world frozen in time and space, locked safely and inertly in stasis. One of those less-usual me-dreams completely lacking a concept of time, where one scene is layered inside of another, and another, wrapped up in a too-widely-interpretable jumble of images in as many dimensions as necessary.

On my street I crossed the path of a small black cat, sitting on the sidewalk I was walking on, staring out intently at nothing in particular. It eventually noticed me coming and darted across to the other side of the street, where it continued staring at the same spot. I’ve seen a lot of that. I kind of wonder some odd stuff, like if schizophrenia is common in cats. Maybe whether when they stare like that, they’re seeing something that isn’t there, or seeing something that only they can.

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