Ok, so apparently this is pants-pissingly funny to chemists* :-)
Norrisolide does not dissolve in water. It pounds the water into a pulp and bathes in where its blood would be if water had blood.
Norrisolide does not get metabolized. It gets even.
Norrisolide consists of x carbon, x hydrogen, x oxygen and 300 fists. The fists cannot be represented in ChemDraw and thus are typically omitted from depictions of the molecule.
Mike Tyson eats Wheaties for breakfast, and swallows because he needs the energy. Norrisolide chews up Golgi bodies for breakfast and spits them out, just because it can.
A sea slug has no eyes, no bones, no limbs, no claws, no teeth and cannot move fast enough to escape predators. But nobody messes with the sea slug, because everyone knows Norrisolide’s got its back.
Norrisolide destroyed the periodic table, because it only recognizes the element of surprise.
If you have $5, and Norrisolide has $5, Norrisolide has $10.
Norrisolide is not the solute, it is the solution.
Air is terrified of Norrisolide and leaves the scene. The Rotovap is just for show.
Movie theaters now serve popcorn in small, medium, large and Norrisolide.
Norrisolide’s components do not have isomers. They have a left-fisted version and a right-fisted version.
Norrisolide is so awesome, only one person in the world has synthesized it in less than 16[?] steps. [insert resume here]
* This is the chemical my gf is synthesizing for her PhD thesis; in the wild it comes from sea slugs. I suggested norrisolidefacts.com viral-chemist-meme as a job-hunting scheme (1. Get shit linked to your resume posted someplace geeky and popular (Slashdot/Digg/etc. or equivalent) 2. ??? 3. Profit! Hey, worked for me ;-)