St. Paddy’s

Ah, good ole St. Patrick’s day… an excuse to go out drinkin’ on a work night. So yeah, all us young farts convened on this place whose name I can’t remember, and tried to dance with a bunch of girls who paid us little attention. I think a couple of us (myself not among them) ended up talking to a couple girls for a while, finding them to be idiots, and parting company politely. Myself, I wiggled my worm all night with only one bite to show for it (ahem, this is speaking completely figuratively), but this was toward the end of the night when the ghetto music was cranked up to about 140dB, facilitating all that bump-n-grind stuff but pretty much eliminating all hope of conversation. Not that I’m complaining about the bump-n-grind, mind you ;-)

PS. Jared, I don’t know what was in that last round, but I think I could see my breath afterward. Flammible-icious.

QOTD:
LOCAL MAN CHOKES TO DEATH TRYING TO PRONOUNCE DANGEROUS WORD

CHOKAWNIT—The celebrated fish filleter and gourmand Hudson Rattletrap has died. He choked to death last night while trying to pronounce the word “blancmange.”

Police are urging citizens to approach this word with caution.

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